Information on Christian Marriage and Sex

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Christian Marriage and Sex

Normal adolescents even yours have sexual interests and feels. They also deeply need love and affirmation. As a result, they can becometionally and sexually attracted to others around them and drawn towardical intimacy. But they also enter adolescence with a sense of modesty that is to inhibit sexual explorations.

These realities were clearly recognized just a few generations modesty was encouraged and more formal boundaries were set between married members of the opposite sex. Today many would call such efforts inhibited, and puritanical. But our ancestors were in many ways more serious about adolescent sexuality and made it somewhat easier for the daughters to resist sexual pressure. Our culture, on the other hand will drowns them in temptation.

Seductive messages. A half century ago, Western societies generally accept the concept that marriage was the appropriate arena for sexual activity. In the late 1960s, a cultural upheaval sometimes called the sexual saulted traditional sexual ground rules. Virtually all popular mediavideos, music) as well as educational, health-care, and governmentaltions were affected by this moral free fall. As a result, by the timerives at puberty, he or she will have heard the following destructive situations many, many times and in a variety of ways:

Four Fantasies of the Sexual Revolution

1.Sex is okay in any which way with whomever, as long as there is no consent, no one gets pregnant (unless she wants to), and no one gets hurt.

2.Sex is usual and customary if you are attracted to someone.

3.Sex unrelated to marriage is normal, natural, expected, as long as in doing so carry a condom.

4.If you are postponing sex until marriage, you must be incredibly unattractive, a social disaster, or a religious fanatic.

Unless they live in complete isolation, adolescents are regularlysexually provocative material that expresses immoral viewpoints, fire -desires, and wears down resistance to physical intimacy. Even in the "safe-of the classroom, a teenager's natural modesty may be dismantled during presentations about sexual matters in mixed company.).

Lack of supervision. Because of fragmented families, complex parent schedules, easier access to transportation, and at times, carelessness in adults who should know better, adolescents today are more likely to be alone together for long stretches of time. In such circumstances, it is likely to take its course, even when a commitment has been rn:until the wedding night for sex.

In gneral sense that "everyone is doing it except me." Movies, TV, videos, and the music nurture this idea. Conversations with friends or even offhanded-eats overheard between strangers bring the idea closer to home. Your school health-education presentation will confirm the suspicion if it emphasizes contraception and condom use but barely mentions abstinence. "These professionals know more about this than I do. I must he the only seven teen-year- town who hasn't had sex." rsonal comments from friends and acquaintances:

• "You've been with him for six months and haven't slept together yet?What's wrong?"

• "Hey, guys, check out Jason, the last American virgin!"

• "Did you do it/score/get lucky last night?"

Direct pressure from another person who wants a sexual experience or an invi- from a willing potential partner. Come-ons, smooth talk, whining, hag-and outright coercion by men who want sex with a woman arc timeworn::ve behaviors. Resistance to them may be lowered by a need for closeness:.:ceptance and the mistaken belief that physical intimacy will secure a man's recent years a turnabout has become common: A young man is informed of his girlfriend (or a recent acquaintance) that she wants to have sex with him.rsonal convictions that sex is intended for marriage will he put to the ultimate by a situation like this, especially if some physical contact is already under-:. All the admonitions he has heard and the moral code he embraces may suddenly seem terribly abstract, while the intense pleasure that is his for_ is very real.

Lack of reasons (and desire) to wait. Some adolescents are determined to _regardless of the risks. Others are unshakably committed to the goal of their first and only sex partner will be their spouse. In between these oppo-_,.-live a large number of teenagers who keep an informal mental tally of rerand against premarital sex. Inner longings and external pressure pull -ward it, while standards taught at home and church, medical warnings,monsense restraints put on the brakes.

For many teenagers (even those who intend to abstain until marria-,sions about sex tend to be made based on the drift of this internal "vote.When the moment of truth arrives, the tally may be close--or a landslickwrong direction. Adolescents with a shaky or negative self-concept may particularly vulnerable to sexual involvement when one of the reasons is to win approval from one or more VIPs. Therefore, without being overbearing or obsessive, make an effort to hawing dialogues with your teenager about the many compelling reasons wpone sex until the wedding night. (It should go without saying thatbe talking to your teenager about many things besides areas of concern. If your communication is smooth in other less volatile areas,flow more easily with a sensitive topic such as sexuality.) The followinzsons to wait may help you formulate and express your thoughts duri:::portant conversations

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